On my last meeting with Southern Femmes’ Megan LaRussa, we spent 3 hours doing a closet cleanse. There was no kale or green tea involved, but my system is completely detoxified and the only things remaining in my closet have been filtered thoroughly.
After a meeting of the minds, measuring of the body parts and a new definition of my personal style, I’ve discovered that I am an Average Full Triangle with an Eclectic Style. I sound so interesting, until I read at the bottom of my “style profile” that my celebrity body stand in is…..
Annie Wilkes, who made the, “Mr. Man!” quote famous in the Stephen King movie, “Misery,” or Madame LaLaurie who plays evil incarnate in “American Horror Story: Coven.” I mean absolutely no disrespect, Ms. Bates, but couldn’t I be a Kate Winslet triangle, instead? I’m much more the “Sense and Sensibilities,” or “Eternal Sunshine…” sort of gal. Horror of any form offends me.
With my closet now cleansed of anything that a triangle shape could not wear, my poor choices of the past have now been donated or consigned. As Megan and I “carted” my wardrobe to the curb, I literally became a bag lady with a cart full of my past wardrobe missteps. I’m very happy that my mistakes will help ladies through the YWCA add pieces to their wardrobes.
To avoid those missteps in the future, I have a new plan. I have a list of things to wear and not to wear. So as I work toward a goal of being more of a Kate Winslet than a Kathy Bates, I will make the following choices.
Boxy cuts, tight fitting dresses, clingy fits, raglan tops, tops that hit at the widest part of my hips, peasant tops, drop waist styles, small spaghetti straps, elastic bands, baggy pants, light-colored cargo pants, cuffed trousers, blazers with small lapels, long straight coats, short boxy coats, choker necklaces, too small purses, shoulder bags that hit at my hips, ankle strap shoes, chunky heels or thick soles other than wedges, square toe shoes.
Once these items were eliminated from my closet, I was left with this…
At first sight, I was terrified that I was going to have nothing to wear. But, in truth, I now have a much more stimulating wardrobe. I make decisions of what to wear much quicker, have improved the circulation of each item, and reduced the amount of stress in my closet every morning. Less is certainly more in this case.
Stay tuned to Fashion Friday to see what choices are good for the body – cleansing and detoxifying is good, but my sense and sensibilities tell me that shopping to replenish will be F U N!
Gotta start somewhere….